What is going on today

Wow thins are trucking along quickly.  We now have a youtube channel set up, and we started the facebook page for the videos we are going to be doing.  The thing is we have yet to produce a video.  Here is a link to the facebook page if you want to be the first non-family member to like it. https://www.facebook.com/pages/edit_page/?id=282127725269935&tab=public&section=website&view#!/honestlymother  We are hoping to tape the first video this weekend.  We will see how that goes.

I am troubled trying to find a balance.  My uncle pointed out an offensive post that was attacking christianity in a very vulgar way.  I had to admit at the time that I had gone too far.  Since then I did tone it down.  Now my uncle is making comments on a post every day for the last 2 days.  These were posts that I could not imagine how they can be offensive.  So where is my balance?  What is the balance of being able to express my opinion and reasons on some of the finer points vs being offensive?  I think I have reached that balance, but my uncle doesn't seem to think so.  He claims to have a live and let live attitude, but if that is the case, then why is he responding every day.  One of the posts that offended him was simply stating that atheists become that way because they stepped back and evaluated their beliefs.  He asked me if I was being hateful and vengeful.  I don't know.  I don't know my uncle well, but he is my uncle and family is important to me.

I have actually felt at peace with myself since I admitted to atheism.  I am feeling a desire not to argue so much, or to convert, but to help people understand me and other atheists.  I want those that care about ne to understand why I believe the way I do, and that atheists are not immoral, just thoughtful.

First thing I would like to ask is who do I think I am kidding.  While I have every respect in the world for wicca and its followers, I find it hard to even believe in the wiccan pantheon.  I love wicca and if I were to join a religion, that is the one I would most likely rejoin.  The plain honest truth is I do not believe in any deities.  I have actually admitted this to myself before, but I have not given it voice.  I always held on to the there is a slim chance that a god or gods do exist therefore I am agnostic.  Who am I kidding?  Not even atheists give it a 100% that there is no higher being, they say its highly unlikely, therefore they do not believe.  I did not want to let go of my wiccan ideals or my wiccan friends.  I still love Simi my sweet to death, but I have to admit even to myself that I do not believe in the christian god, nor do I believe in the Lord and the Lady.  This does not mean I love my Simi or my Vas any less, it only means I am being honest with myself.

Well I sent my lil girl with her dad this morning wearing the first chainmail neckless I have made in about 10 years.  She was tickled pink.  I am tickled pink to be making jewelry again.  I have to take it easy on my hands, but nothing good comes completely painless.  I have been getting deeper and deeper into the atheist debates....yet I consider myself agnostic.  The only thing holding me back from declaring atheism, is that I haven't completely given up on the wiccan belief system.  I want to sit in a good circle and see if I still believe.  Something tells me however, that even if I have a question in my mind, I already know the answer.  It is hard for me to believe in any gods.  I guess, that is not a step I am prepared to take, but I am very close.