What is going on today

I know its been a long time since I have posted.  The main reason is that I figured posting would do more harm for me then good.  I spent much of the last few weeks trying to face my interest in Shawn without letting it overwhelm me.  I did at one time give him an out which would have helped me as well, except he completely took the out off of the table.  Then last Thursday he surprised me by telling me he wanted to date me.  So now we are an item and I can move past all my worries and concerns and enjoy myself.  He is the most wonderful and sweet guy I have ever known.  He says he sees a lot of potential in our relationship and I agree with him.  I have no problem with the idea of needing to reclaim my independence because Shawn gives me a lot of room to be myself and grow with myself. He is also a wonderful influence sometimes with example and sometimes with suggestion in helping me to constantly improve myself.  I don't take every suggestion he offers and he doesn't hold that against me.  So the long and the short of it is that I am at a very wonderful place in my life right now.

I had a very nice couple of days.  To my surprise my mom wanted to do an activity with Virgil on Saturday.  If I would have known that we were going to take Katelin to the zoo, I would have done something a little more with Lexy during her time.  I will make it up to her Later.  Shawn came over yesterday morning.  We watched Mr and Mrs Smith.  He had never seen that movie before. 

Yesterday I got my couch and it is awesome.  It is soft and comfy and looks great in my living room.  That is my Lexy lounging on the new couch.  Yesterday was a rollercoaster day. I was super excited about getting the new couch.  Then I was disappointed because Shawn had to back out on a date for the second time in a row.  I'm trying not to let it be a flashback to Angel because Shawn is nothing like Angel.  Angel would make dates and cancel them at the last minute all the time.  I don't think Shawn was blowing me off though.  I believe he truly had a good reason.  He just hasn't had a chance to give a full explanation.

I haven't written much in the last couple of days because nothing much has happened.  I am concerned though.  I suspect my ADD is starting to kick in.  I have been able to compensate most of my life, mostly because I am so logically minded.  I find myself going off task often.  I also find myself easily confused when put on the spot.  I also temember things incorrectly that I know the correct answer to.   That is a big reason why I write better than I talk.  I can answer in my own time and not feel the pressure of the person waiting for a response.  I have not felt the necessity to ever get it diagnosed or treated, and I still don't.  I still compensate well, its just that it is starting to be noticeable in my personal life.