I am just a sucker for punishment. I thought I would be fine being just friends with Shawn, but it came sneaking up on me and I found myself mooning over him. I told him about it and he again reaffirmed that he does not reciprocate.
He was understanding and compassionate about it which just made things worse. He feels that we can work through it as friends. I am surprised that he hasn't just thrown up his hands and said I wasn't worth the trouble. Craziness.